Kenyan Idiot

ERROR: Mistake, Something not done correctly OR to be wrong in conduct or judgment. This week the weather was atrocious and it gave us something to moan about other than politics and just when we thought that would be the only bothersome topic we were all forced to re think, sit up and take notice of the ‘storm in a teacup’ that brewed all too suddenly, as once forgotten errors came back to haunt the government and most especially the AG. As the proposed constitution hit the AG’s desk for editing, he promised only to add full stops, commas and to correct any grammatical errors, and all seemed well, that is until the 47 page document left his desk and went into Gitonga Rukwaro’s hands for publishing. The document was then released to the public as a pull out in their daily papers. All was well and civic education was soon to begin – someone once said that when things are too good to be true then it probably is – but were to be awoken form the lull by the ghost of errors past come b...

This week the VP was up to his old tricks again, doing his now infamous jig this time the party trick was on show to those in the yes and no factions of the referendum and although the guests were not mesmerised by his skills they seemed to indulge him as he fiddled between the camps somewhat restless and anxious. It all began with his support of the referendum last week when Kalonzo said in Kingungi as he escorted President Kibaki to Nakuru that there was still room for negotiations. Later that day he changed his stand after the President insisted that the draft would go to the referendum without amendments. He then agreed to amend and extend the time of the draft a proposition put forward by Higher education Minister William Ruto. But all was still not well for the man from Mwingi as he changed his mind once more and seconding the resolution not to amend the draft headed off to Muranga to sing the documents praises. It seems though that no one told the VP to be weary of the powe...

This past week was chock full of the kind of intrigue that a top rated soap opera or political drama can only dream of, with the constitutional debate heating up and the lines between the ‘Yeses’ and the ‘No’s being drawn firmly in the sand political loyalty would count more than ever before. The week started off as any other, then Wednesday swung around and the political air became hotter than a Mombasa mid day. It all began when the President and Prime Minister put their heads together in consultation and reshuffled their cabinet. As with any reshuffle someone had to ‘demoted’, this time around that (un)lucky- though he would have us believe otherwise- someone was William Samoei Arap Ruto whose once friendly and cordial relationship with the PM took on a sour note a few months ago when the latter attempted – unsuccessfully – to suspend the then Agriculture and Education ministers on grounds of corruption. This act has only served to intensify the rocky relationships. Rutos demotion f...

From No, to Yes and back to sitting on the fence, we’ve seen it all this past week as our leaders continue to treat the new draft constitution like a sport with each MP picking a team and scoring a goal for their prospective side either within the confines of parliament or out and about surrounded by the masses of prospective voters. Each valiantly championing his/her side in the hope of spurring them to an outright victory, each eager to gain more fans as he/she criss-crosses the country and speaks to his ever listening and increasingly judgemental fans. However as in any sport there is bound to be those players that desert their teams in a moment of enlightenment and in anticipation of better things, this past week Najib Balala minister for tourism was the defector who chose to migrate from the No camp to that of those in support of the draft. In an attempt to quell the tempers of their brothers of the cloth the President and Prime Minister sat down in negotiations with church lead...

These past few weeks have been chock full of the big bad abortion debate and wherever conception really begins. The church put its foot in it once again by saying that they speak for all Christians when they outlaw abortion and that would raise hell and all manner of objections were the dastardly act enshrined within its pages. I am at pains to explain that the church does not speak for all Christians. Being one myself I do believe that it is a morally wrong act and should not be performed with reckless abandon by any woman who simply does not want a child, having said that though I do believe that if the pregnancy endangers the life of the mother the doctor should then be allowed to suggest the procedure, sign off on and perform said procedure. I also believe that these were the exact sentiments of the law makers when they wrote the article to legalise the act. As the past week wore on I began to see another area where the mother of said child may want to or have to partake in endi...

Esther Adongo Arunga is now Esther Adongo Timberlake. This latest twist in the tale came on Friday as Esther along with her mentor Joseph Hellon sat down with the press- the same media that she is suing and had earlier accused of ‘bogus journalism’- and told them that she was in the process of suing not only the press but her parents and famed psychologist Njenga for unlawful detention and sedation. She also declared that she was ‘happily married to Quincy Timberlake’ who is still in jail. When she was asked how the marriage had happened she quieried ‘don’t you know that people get married while on death row’ Well in case she was unaware her new husband is neither a dead man walking or anywhere near death. The 28 year old wants 300 million from her parents Dr. Robert Arunga and Mrs. Petoline Arunga and had further asked the courts to restrain the two from interfeiring with her rights and freedoms. So this is how some choose to repay their parents for their years of love, affection and...

The past week has had me shaking my head in disbelief and laughing probably harder than I should. The big story of the week is the Finger of God ministry and its leader Joseph Hellon along with his famous side kick Esther Arunga. Apparently Esther left her cuhsy job at KTN on last week for reasons that seem neither here nor there. On Thursday the 28 year old beauty came out to clear the air with some fighting words to the media saying that they were engaged in 'stupid reporting' and garbage reporting. She also revealed having quit her job with KTN, called off her planned wedding to Mr Malaba and was now living in the church mansion with Mr Helon and his wife Kuyu and other followers. She also denied that she had shut her family and friends out of her life, although her parents and siblings expressed concern over her well-being. Her 'spiritual mentor' Joseph Hellon with whom she lives in Runda was by her side where he stated that 'no news is bad news' and proc...